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It’s no secret that one of the tricks to attract readers to your blog is to find a way to stand out.
“So,” I’ve asked myself lately, “what is it that I think makes me stand out from the countless other Christian bloggers out there? Why do people choose this site over that site?”
I believe it’s because of my authenticity. Do you agree?
On May 2 I wrote a post called, “Hail Mary. Hail Mary. Hail Mary. Sigh…” This post was the first time that I allowed myself to indicate any type of dissatisfaction with a specific denomination of Christianity. A few of you openly applauded my boldness. A few of you openly expressed your disgust with my non-friendliness. The truth is, I barely even began to scratch the surface of how I really feel towards certain religions, Christians, etc. I’ve made a conscious effort to remain “friendly” as the FriendlyChristian.com domain name would suggest.
As a result, I have cheated you. More importantly (yes, more importantly), I have been dishonest with myself. I’ve been anything but authentic. The truth is, I’m not always friendly. Lots of stuff pisses me off. Heck, you guys sometimes piss me off! 
If I think it’s wrong to pray to statues, “idolize the Pope, a man with sin” (via Adam), and claim to be the only true religion because of Apostolic Authority, I should be able to say that without fear for being labeled as ‘unfriendly!’ Maybe I’ll say that someday. 
As I type I’m starting to realize something: Jesus was anything but a friendly Christian. Maybe I’ve chosen the wrong path. I’m all about being a friendly Christian, but I will not sacrifice the truths of the bible simply to maintain ‘friendly’ status with somebody.
Also as I type, I’m sure that “you” believe that your flavor of Christianity is biblically sound and ultimately right. “You,” therefore, will disagree with what I claim to be biblically accurate. We, as a result, will disagree and butt heads. I guess I’m really not a friendly standout as I thought I was. Oh well.
So now what? I’m not interested in turning my site into “The Gospel according to Bill Cecchini,” however, I would like to allow myself to truly be honest. I hesitate because I know that as soon as I open my big mouth, the comments will begin to flow and the frustration will inevitably set in. Also, I’m not interested in debating. I would love to figure out a way to be completely honest with my readers, while at the same time not coming across as an arrogant know-it-all. I know the subject of religion is touchy, so I question the feasibility of this goal.
I have no desire to be an obnoxious Christian who tears down religions and does no more than cause a scene; the world has too many of those already. All I’m saying is that I’d like to put the ‘friendly’ tag aside every so often and say what’s really on my mind. I can do that, can’t I? Will you be offended? Probably? Will I care? Yeah, but I’m working on that. Will I lose readers? I’d guess so. Will I be able to sleep better knowing that I’ve been honest and said what’s really on my mind? I’m guessing yes.
If you’re interested, join me and my resurrected authenticity and see where this crazy site goes. If I lose ya, it’s been fun, friend. Really. Nothin but love here.
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Excellent. It’s great to have opinions and to share them. I do have two small pieces of advice though…not that you asked for it….
1. Be prepared to have your opinions, values and ideas challenged and even ridiculed.
2. Be prepared to change your mind and admit that sometimes you might just have been wrong.
I don’t believe that you’ll have a problem with these.
Bill,
It’s your blog, man; you are not obligated to anybody but yourself and God, so follow your conscience on this. Nothing wrong with calling it like you see it. You may lose some readers and pick up some others. “Friendly” to me means civil discussion, not refraining from saying what you think.
As one of your Christian readers, I will still come back even when I disagree with you, unless you somehow go completely off of your rocker.
And by the way, I applauded your comments about the Pope. Don’t even get me started on that subject…
Hey Bill-
I agree with Hover and Odgie. It’s your blog-don’t be hamstrung by worries about what the readership will think.
I actually wish that more Christians would take time to examine and discuss the things that make them nervous about traditions other than their own. My mom is a minister in a small town. There’s a minister at another church there who tried to take her to task for not doing things his way. She avoided calling him a creep by simply saying she’d rather believe they’re all on the side of Christ and leave it at that. Me, I wish she’d have said something gentle about her worries that his preaching hatred of Islam and Judaism doesn’t match ~her~ theology and makes her worry for the safety of some of the minorities in their isolated community.
If people are too scared to openly discuss their differences, how will they have the courage to discover their similarities?
Hi Bill
I think it’s good that you’re thinking about these issues. You need to do what you’re comfortable with, rather than letting anyone else tell you how your blog should be.
I don’t entirely agree with this: Jesus was anything but a friendly Christian.
Jesus is often depicted as friendly. When he’s unfriendly it tends to be towards religious leaders rather than non-religious people.
Anyway have fun posting your opinions and seeing what happens :d
It’s your blog. Say what you want. But don’t be surprised when people call you on any leaps in logic, distortions of fact and assumptions.
Thanks for the boost of confidence, guys. I appreciate it! Hov, I couldn’t agree with you more!
Helen,
You’re right and I’m wrong.
Rev. BigDumbChimp,
I’m guess that I’ll be hearing from ya soon. :)>-
I for one don’t want to read a blog where the author is less than honest. Bo-ring. You are friendly because you allow people with differing opinions to discuss here and you don’t spend all your time telling us we are going to hell, etc. Being friendly should not require being phony.
And what hoverfrog said.
Also, don’t take it personally if people disagree with you in the comments. Just because we disagree, doesn’t mean that we think what you have to say is worthless.
But if you turn into a Chick tract (anti-Catholic or otherwise), I’m outta here!
P.S. I know how you feel. I’ve been going through a period of change lately, too, and have stirred up a few hornet’s nests of comments on Skepchick. Readers may get uncomfortable when you are going through a change and bleed on the “page”….. that’s OK.
Honesty? Who wants honesty? I want the fake Bill back!!!
I’m kidding of course. Way to go man…Can’t wait to see where this next chapter takes us!
Sleepless in Minnesota,
Jason@-)
Hey Bill … all this business about Jesus being friendly or only being “not friendly” to only relgious people. Not buying it … was his Mother a religious leader? No, but he was “not friendly” to her … i.e. he initially rejected her plea to turn water into wine, he scolded her for being upset with him when he “was about His father’s business” after being left behind. How about his siblings … religiuos leaders? NOT! But Jesus answers who is my mother? Who are my brothers? Not exactly words to make friends by.
Peter, a disciple, a simple fisherman was told to his face “get behind me Satan”. Or how about the rich young ruler? He got the nice guy treatment … Jesus tells him “Go, sell everything you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.”
Jesus was NOT all nice all the time to all the people. Jesus was an in your face with truth and LIFE kind of guy. He didn’t mince words, nor was he a people pleaser. Why do people get the impression that he was sweet and petite all the time?
Jesus had a knack for saying the right thing to the right people at the right time. He was and is no respector of people. He was a respector of God. Now if we truly want to be like Jesus, maybe we shouldn’t concentrate so much on being friendly to all people at all times but maybe we should concentrate on speaking LIFE into people.
Sometimes speaking life into someone means not being friendly (think drug intervention, judge sentencing, school counselors, police officers, parents, spouses, bosses and the like.)
And when it comes to eternal life, if we follow Jesus’ method then we speak LIFE in whatever way makes sense to the person hearing us. It is what it is.
I think that it’s inevitable when talking about such a personal subject as religion that people are going to be perceived as “unfriendly.” It’s one of the major complaints about the “New Atheists,” despite the fact that Daniel Dennet tried unsuccessfully to address the points in his book without being seen as rude.
Please, be honest. Because if you can’t be honest with us on the Internet, who can you be honest with? It’s not like we’re all going to come over to your house and beat you up if we don’t like what you say.
Are the New Atheists perceived as rude and unfriendly? Really? I’ve read a few of Richard Dawkin’s books and I am reading one of Christopher Hitchins at the moment. Forthright and honest is what I get, not any sense of an intentional insult.
OK maybe “religion poisons everything” might be seen as a tad unfriendly :d but not when you see the wrong that has been committed in the name of religion. Note that “religion”, “faith”, and “God” are different things. I would say that the arguments in the books by the “Four Horsemen” are against religion more than anything else.
Can I start calling you a militant Christian ?
(tongue firmly planted in cheek)
Papa Grande, here’s what’s missing from your post
After saying those words to Peter, etc. Jesus died on the cross for them
If you’re going to do something amazingly loving and sacrificial for me, then, sure, you can say something to me that might sound unfriendly, because you obviously care about me.
I’ve encountered a number of Christians who love to follow Jesus in being unfriendly as they see him being unfriendly and they seem to forget the part about doing amazingly sacrificial things that prove they care. (By that I mean things which are valuable to the other person, which cost them something)
Probably because they don’t care. Which in fact makes them not at all like Jesus, in spite of emulating his unfriendliness.
So how’s the unfriendliness going for you? Or is there more to the story - are you doing things for others which give you the right to be ‘unfriendly’?
The world is full of unfriendly people.
Who needs another one, especially a Christian.
That said, wait until the atheists get control of us, and the wave is coming.
We have seen what they do historically…its Gulags and torture and death for believers who don’t denounce the truth.
Of course, the perpetrators of these crimes are all now in HELL, but that doesn’t help me now.
See our forums and challenge IGGY, the vicious athesit who wants to “eat your brains” according to his own words.
The most insane vicious atheist I have ever encountered in real life.
I saw written above:
>”I will not sacrifice the truths of
>the bible simply to maintain ‘friendly’
>status with somebody.”
What the hell is that? Since when are you the guardian of the “truths of the Bible”?? I got a hint for ya, pal. You are not the keeper of the “truths of the Bible”. You don’t own them. You don’t speak for them. You don’t define them. You don’t have the power to “sacrifice” them and you certainly don’t get to use them to be an obnoxious, manipulative jerk in the name of Christendom.
If you see someone else not in keeping with YOUR definition of the “truths of the Bible” keep your mouth shut and don’t speak until spoken to.
Ya got that?! Good!
Emanuel Goldstein, “they” are human beings with the same basic needs and desires as you. Atheists are not monsters bent of world domination, ready to feed Christians to the lions at the slightest provocation. Perpetuating such a ridiculous myth quite simply makes you look like an ignorant bigot.
Throwing in the childish scare tactic of “hell” for unbelievers is also not an effective way to reach out to people and connect with them.
“The world is full of unfriendly people” indeed but it is also full of friendly people. Why then go out of your way to deliberately alienate them and reinforce the negative stereotype of Christian bigotry?
Of course, you could just be a troll. If you are then pretend that I didn’t just feed you. :d
mark,
First of all, I don’t appreciate your sarcastic, condescending tone. I don’t know how you get off thinking that a tough guy comment like that is going to create decent conversation.
Second,
1. Since I became a follower of Christ.
2. Yes I am.
3. Yes I do.
4. Yes I do. I’m a Christian. Everything I say and do speaks either for or against my God.
5. Yes I do (well, I try to at least).
IMO, every Christian should be “keeper” of the truths of the bible; hence he/she owns them…makes them their own, speaks for them, and defines them.
You serious? It’s actually quite simple. If I do something that goes against what I believe to be truths just for the sake of being friendly, I have sacrificed who I am.
Hey, we agree on something!
Is this even relevant to anything that has been said?
=))
In the end, mark, I don’t know why I’m even responding to your comment. Truthfully, it doesn’t deserve my effort. If you want to be negative, that’s fine. If you disagree with me, great; we have TONS of that on this site. I can tell you this, though, this is the last time that I respond to a comment like yours…not that that matters to you.
:)>-
:d